Updated October 8, 2020
Dear SRL community,
For those of you who are parents sharing custody and/or have access arrangements or support orders in place, these are especially difficult and worrying times.
The COVID-19 crisis means you will want and need to be as clear as possible in coming to an agreement over how you will handle the public health issues and the health and safety of your children. Note that any existing court order remains in effect, but you may have to adapt to circumstances. For example, is one parent a front line worker? Does one parent reside with especially vulnerable others? These issues now include how you will handle your child’s schooling, since we are back in the school year. You may want to consider making a temporary agreement to stabilize what will happen over the coming weeks and months.
As well, some people’s income is being affected by COVID-related lay-offs. Again, any existing court order remains in effect. However, if you know that the circumstances of the party paying support have changed, you may want to consider making a temporary agreement to stabilize what will happen over the coming months.
To assist you, we are offering below:
- Some template clauses on social distancing undertakings by co-parents that, depending on your situation, you can propose to your co-parent, and of course modify if you wish. If the other side is represented by a lawyer, we recommend that you communicate directly with the lawyer by email or phone.
- A complete model parenting agreement, written by Hannah M. DeJong, a family lawyer with Boughton Law, Vancouver, which again you can propose to the other co-parent and modify as you agree between you.
- (NEW) some template clauses that you can use to make an agreement with your co-parent regarding your child’s schooling, written by Shmuel Stern of the Disclosure Clinic.
If you do make an arrangement that is different from your existing court order (or even an informal arrangement you have been observing), we recommend you put it in writing and have both parties sign and keep a copy for themselves. You can do this over email; if you do not have a scanner, you can take a photo of the signed copy and send this by email to the other parent.
Please note: this is not legal advice.
Good luck. These are difficult times for everyone, and extra patience is going to be required of us all.
Julie
- Each parent will practice strict social distancing, both during parenting and outside of their parenting time. This means avoiding unnecessary out-of-home errands, and maintaining at least a 2-metre distance from other people.
- Both during and outside of their parenting time, both parents will strictly follow public health recommendations regarding cleaning and safety precautions. These include frequent hand-washing, use of disinfectants and sanitizers, and any other public health directives.
- For necessities like groceries, each parent will either arrange for delivery services or reduce attendances at grocery stores to the absolute minimum possible, and wherever possible go to the grocery store without the child / children present.
- During their parenting time, each parent will impose social distancing measures on the child / children in accordance with current guidelines in their jurisdiction. In-person play dates, attendance at public playgrounds or the like will be handled responsibly and according to provincial guidelines, and each parent will keep the other informed of all such outings, including identification of third-party contacts.
- If a parent exhibits symptoms of COVID-19 or feels unwell (or has been in contact with any person who has travelled within the last 14 days, or who has been diagnosed or been exhibiting symptoms), that parent will immediately notify the other parent and commence a 14-day period of isolation. If the child or children are with the non-isolating parent at that time, it may be appropriate for them to remain with that parent until the end of the 14 days. There should be a plan in place for the child to be removed if the infected parent’s condition deteriorates. If the child / children are currently with the parent entering isolation, they will remain with that parent for the next 14 days.
- During their parenting time, each parent will ensure that the child / children complete their daily school work as informed by their school(s) via the technology being used for this.
- (Where either parent or anyone in the household is an essential service worker working with the public, e.g. doctors, nurses, supermarket or pharmacy employees, flight attendants, etc.) Acknowledging the increased risk of exposure of (parent or household member), there will be complete transparency with the other parent regarding whether or not there has been any contact with someone who has been diagnosed or has been exhibiting symptoms of COVID-19.
Developed by Hannah M. DeJong, Boughton Law, Vancouver
We agree to the following parenting arrangements for the next one/two/three months, or until the BC (or substitute other provincial) government no longer recommends everyone follow social distancing practices, whichever comes first:
- Each parent will practice strict social distancing, both during parenting and outside of their parenting time. This means each parent will:
stay home as much as possible and avoid unnecessary out-of-home errands;
b. work from home and conduct virtual meetings where possible;
c. use technology to keep in touch with friends and family instead of in-person gatherings; and
d. maintain at least a 2-metre distance from other people in public places. - Both during and outside of their parenting time, both parents will strictly follow public health recommendations regarding cleaning and safety precautions. These include frequent hand-washing, use of disinfectants and sanitizers, and any other public health directives.
- For necessities like groceries, each parent will either arrange for delivery services or reduce attendances at grocery stores to the absolute minimum possible, and wherever possible go to the grocery store without the child / children.
- During their parenting time, each parent will impose social distancing measures on the child / children in accordance with current guidelines in their jurisdiction. In-person play dates, attendance at public playgrounds or the like will be handled responsibly and according to provincial guidelines, and each parent will keep the other informed of all such outings, including identification of third-party contacts.
- If a parent shows symptoms of COVID-19 or feels unwell (or has been in contact with any person who has travelled within the last 14 days, or who has been diagnosed or showing symptoms), that parent will immediately notify the other parent and start a 14-day period of isolation. If the child or children are with the non-isolating parent at that time, it may be appropriate for them to remain with that parent until the end of the 14 days. There should be a plan in place for the child to be removed if the infected parent’s condition deteriorates. If the child / children are currently with the parent entering isolation, they will remain with that parent for the next 14 days.
- If a parent notices that the child /children shows symptoms of COVID-19 or feels unwell, the parent who is currently with the child / children will immediately notify the other parent and start a 14-day period of isolation with the child / children.
- During periods of isolation, the parents will facilitate daily video calls between the child / children and the non-isolating parent.
- During their parenting time, each parent will ensure that the child / children complete their daily school work as informed by their school(s) via the technology being used for this.
Note: Parents should also consider the following recommendations from psychologist Dr. Elterman, which have been referenced with approval by BC courts:
- If the parent is in a home with older family members or friends or with individuals who are immune-compromised, the child should not be in that home.
- If parenting time is to occur in a public place such as a community centre, a mall, or a restaurant, then it should be suspended.
- If a supervisor is required who is not the spouse of the parent and living in the home, then the parenting time should be suspended.
Further: Here is another set of clauses that you can use and adapt for your own use, provided by the Association of Family Conciliation Courts Ontario, and drafted by Professor Nick Bala.
Template schooling arrangement clauses for parents
The following template clauses have been developed with Shmuel Stern, founder of the Disclosure Clinic.
- Option Selection and Duration[Party 1: parent] and [Party 2: parent] agree that for the period commencing on [Date], [Child] will attend [Child’s School] in-person (meaning, physically attending their school class) for as long as the option is available.Communication with the School
Each party is responsible to be signed up with the school and class email lists to receive updates from [Child]’s school board, school, and teachers, as applicable.
If applicable, a parent with primary contact and access with the school will provide the other parent with the contact information for each of the child’s teachers, and ensure that the other parent is authorized or directed to access the school’s online parent portal. The other parent will confirm that the child’s teachers are aware of [their] contact information, and that they are available to receive important messages sent home.
Child is Properly Equipped
Each party is responsible to ensure that when [Child] is in their care, they are properly prepared for COVID-19 restrictions at school, including ensuring that [Child] attends school with 2 masks (a primary and a backup), and hand sanitizer.
Temporary Closure
In the event that [Child]’s in-person participation is temporarily suspended because of quarantining policy or temporary shutdown of a class or school, the parties agree (choose as applicable):
[ ] to maintain the current parenting schedule [add if appropriate: If the parent whose care the child is in needs modifications to that schedule, they will first ask the other parent and, if the other parent is unavailable, make other arrangements for the care of the child] OR
[ ] that [Parent 1] will make a proposal for [Parent 2] to review and comment on. In the event they cannot agree, they will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name] OR
[ ] that they will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
Long Term Closure
In the event that [Child]’s in-person option from the school is no longer available, the parties agree (choose as applicable):
[ ] to maintain the current parenting schedule [add if appropriate: and if the parent whose care the child is in needs modifications to that schedule, they will first ask the other parent and, if the other parent is unavailable, make other arrangements for the care of the child] OR
[ ] to change the current schedule such that [Insert specific changes – for example, that on specific days the child will be in the care of a specific parent or third party] OR
[ ] that [Parent 1] will make a proposal for [Parent 2] to review and comment on. In the event they cannot agree, they will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name] OR
[ ] that they will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
If applicable, the parties also agree that [Child] is permitted to contact the other parent during their care, by telephone or video, for assistance with their studies. If [Child] is demonstrating particular difficulty in [particular subject], the parties agree to carve out specific individual time for [Parent] to ‘tutor’ the child in that area on [insert Date/Time].
Scheduled School Day Closure (PA Day)
[ ] where there is a school day off (e.g. PA day), the parties agree as follows: check the school calendar and insert specific changes here] _________________________
In Event of Remote Learning
In addition to communication from the school, both parents will exchange any additional important information they receive as to online learning.
So long as the in-person option is not available, each parent is responsible to use best efforts while [Child] is in their care to ensure [Child] is present at online school during scheduled classes while in their respective care, and both parties must encourage the timely and thoughtful completion of assigned homework.
Each parent is responsible to ensure the Child has appropriate technology to facilitate remote learning, OR:
[ ] make arrangements with the school to obtain such technology OR
[ ] the parties will address purchasing such technology as a special expense
Current Parenting Schedule to Prevail
The parties agree that any changes to the current parenting schedule for the purpose of facilitating online schooling is a temporary accommodation. Upon the resumption of in-person learning, or for the purpose of any holiday time already agreed/ordered [Insert as needed: including winter break, March break, and summer vacation], they will return to the current parenting schedule as agreed between the parties or ordered by a court.
Option Selection and Duration
[Party 1] and [Party 2] agree that for the period commencing on [Date], [Child] will attend [Child’s School] online/remote learning option for:
[ ] as long as the option is available OR
[ ] the current semester, until the first switch-over election date OR
[ ] until [Specify date or school event, e.g. end of semester, winter holiday, etc.] OR
[ ] until [Specify change in the health or other condition/event on which the online option decision was based, preferably based on a mutually agreeable standard, e.g. the recommendation of the physician of the party whose health would otherwise be placed at unacceptable risk of harm, or a school infection rate].
Communication
Each party is responsible to be signed up with the school and class email lists to receive updates from [Child]’s school board, school, and teachers, as applicable. If applicable, a parent with primary contact and access with the school shall provide the other parent with the contact information for each of the children’s respective teachers, and ensure that the other parent is authorized or directed to access the school’s online parent portal. The other parent will confirm that the children’s teachers are aware of [their] contact information, and that they are available to receive important messages sent home.
In addition to communication from the school, both parents will exchange any additional important information they receive as to online learning.
Parenting Schedule to Apply
So long as [Child] will attend online/remote learning provided by the school, the parties agree (choose as applicable):
[ ] they will maintain the current parenting schedule [add if appropriate: and if the parent whose care the child is in needs modifications, they will first ask the other parent and, if the other parent is unavailable, they will make other arrangements for the care of the child] OR
[ ] to change the current schedule such that [Insert specific changes, for example, that on specific days the child will be in the care of a specific parent or third party] OR
[ ] where there is a school day off (e.g. PA day), the parties agree as follows [check the school calendar and insert specific changes here] _________________________OR
[ ] that [Parent 1] will make a proposal for [Parent 2] to review and comment on. In the event they cannot agree, they will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name] OR
[ ] they will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
If applicable, the parties also agree that [Child] is permitted to contact the other parent during their care, by telephone or video, for assistance with their studies. If [Child] is demonstrating particular difficulty in [particular subject], the parties agree to carve out specific individual time for [Parent] to ‘tutor’ the child in that area on [insert Date/Time].
Maintaining Educational Continuity
So long as the in-person option is not available, each parent is responsible to use best efforts while [Child] is in their care to ensure [Child] is present at online school during scheduled classes while in their respective care, and both parties shall encourage the timely and thoughtful completion of assigned homework.
Each parent is responsible to ensure the Child has appropriate technology to facilitate remote learning, OR:
[ ] make arrangements with the school to obtain such technology OR
[ ] the parties will address purchasing such technology as a special expense
Current Parenting Schedule to Prevail
The parties agree that any changes to the current parenting schedule for the purpose of facilitating online schooling is a temporary accommodation. Upon the resumption of in-person learning or for the purpose of any holiday time already agreed/ordered, (Insert as needed: including winter break, March break, and summer vacation) they will return to the current parenting schedule as agreed between the parties or ordered by a court.
Duration
The parties agree that [Child] will be homeschooled by [one parent/both parents] for the:
[ ] fall 2020 school term OR
[ ] fall 2020 and winter/spring 2021 school terms
30 days before the end of the agreed term, the parties will wholly review and assess the educational model for [Child] to continue going forward.
Schedule
During the school year, the regular schedule will continue but [Child] will be in [Parent]’s care every weekday, from [time] to [time], for homeschooling.
Curriculum
[Homeschooling Parent/both parents] will be responsible to teach [Child] the [grade level] curriculum on the posted schedule as provided by [agreed homeschool materials provider].
Communication and Homework
The parties will communicate [agreed frequency, e.g. daily, weekly] regarding the child’s educational progress and upcoming assignments. Each parent is responsible to encourage the timely and thoughtful completion of assigned school work while the child is in their care.
Discontinuing Homeschooling
In the event [Homeschooling Parent is/both parents are] unable to continue homeschooling for any reason including but not limited to: [Homeschool Parent]’s time available time for teaching is restricted, prolonged illness of [Homeschool Parent]; the child is not thriving, the parties agree to:
[ ] review the available schooling options for the balance of the term, as well as options for the upcoming term
[ ] to enroll the child in remote learning OR
[ ] to enroll the child in in-person learning at the next available date as provided by the School Board
[ ] In the event of disagreement, the parties will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name]
[ ] In the event of disagreement, the parties will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
Duration
The parties agree that [Child] will attend pod learning with [Providers] (“the providers”) with up to [number] participating children per class for the:
[ ] fall 2020 school term OR
[ ] fall 2020 and winter/spring 2021 school terms
30 days before the end of the agreed term, the parties will wholly review and assess the educational model for [Child] to continue going forward.
Cost Sharing
The parties agree that for the agreed term [only] they will treat the cost of pod learning as an extraordinary expense and parent 1 will pay ___% and parent 2 will pay ___% of the expense:
In the event the expense is tax deductible or claimable as a tax credit by at least one party, the payment of the expense by the other party will be net of the cash value of the allowable credit on that party’s taxes as calculated using Divorcemate Software, based on their [estimated year] income.
Communication
Each party is responsible to be signed up with [Providers] and email lists to receive updates as applicable. If applicable, a parent with primary contact and access with the providers shall provide the other parent the contact information for each of the child’s respective teachers and ensure that the other parent is authorized or directed to access the providers’ online parent portal. The other parent will confirm that the child’s teachers are aware of [their] contact information, to receive important messages sent home.
Properly Equipped
Each party is responsible to ensure that when [Child] is in their care, they are properly prepared for COVID-19 restrictions at the providers’, including ensuring that [Child] attends the providers’ with 2 masks (a primary and a backup), and hand sanitizer.
Temporary Closure
In the event that [Child]’s in-person participation is temporarily suspended because of quarantining policy or temporary shutdown of the pod or providers, the parties agree (choose as applicable):
[ ] they will maintain the current parenting schedule [add if appropriate: and if the parent whose care the child is in needs modifications, that parent will first ask the other parent and, if the other parent is unavailable, that parent otherwise is responsible for the care of the child] OR
[ ] that [Parent 1] will make a proposal for [Parent 2] to review and comment on. In the event they cannot agree, they will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name] OR
[ ] they will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
Scheduled School Day Closure
[ ] where there is a school day off (e.g. PA day), the parties agree [check the school calendar and insert specific changes here] _________________________
Long Term Closure
In the event that [Child]’s in-person option from the providers is no longer available, the parties agree (choose as applicable):
[ ] they will maintain the current parenting schedule [add if appropriate: and if the parent whose care the child is in needs modifications, they will first ask the other parent and, if the other parent is unavailable, they will make other arrangements for the care of the child] OR
[ ] to change the current schedule such that [Insert specific changes – for example, that on specific days the child will be in the care of a specific parent or third party]
[ ] that [Parent 1] will make a proposal for [Parent 2] to review and comment on. In the event they cannot agree, they will mediate the issue through [mediation professional or mediation centre name] OR
[ ] they will rely on the dispute resolution terms in their separation agreement/court order
In Event of Remote Learning
So long as the pod option is not available, each parent is responsible to use best efforts while [Child] is in their care to ensure [Child] is present at online school during scheduled classes, and both parties must encourage the timely and thoughtful completion of assigned homework.
In addition to communication from the school, both parents will exchange any additional important information they receive as to online learning.
Each parent is responsible to ensure the Child has appropriate technology to facilitate remote learning, OR:
[ ] make arrangements with the provider or school to obtain such technology OR
[ ] the parties will address purchasing such technology as a special expense
Current Parenting Schedule to Prevail
The parties agree that any changes to the current parenting schedule for the purpose of facilitating online schooling is a temporary accommodation. Upon the resumption of in-person learning with the providers, or for the purpose of any holiday time already agreed/ordered [Insert as needed: including winter break, March break, and summer vacation], they will return to the current parenting schedule as agreed between the parties or ordered by a court.
These are great, thank you! I suggest there should also be a clause dealing with what to do if a child develops symptoms. For example, #5 could read, “If a parent or child exhibits symptoms of COVID-19…”
And a clause for daily video calls during self-isolation periods for the parent who doesn’t have the child.
Thank you for the suggestions Hannah!
What happens if your ex refuses to sign it?
Thank you so much for this template! It has been quite difficult dealing with personal issues but this whole covid thing made it much more worse. Grocery time was a great bonding experience for us but sadly it’s something that I have to give up but I’ll do anything for the safety of my child!
Great article!
What do you do if your son is immunocompromised, is non verbal, high lvl of autism, heart issues, has seizures
. Etc.. And the courts are rushing and forcing her to drop her son in another city. If anyone needs to protected from covid19 is her son. We live in kingston.. The father is coming from Barrie/Toronto area. The judge is putting her son in jeopardy and using the court as one size fits all… What will happened if she doesn’t comply until the state of emergency im Ontario has been lifted. This is her sons life on the line and by the province and federal guidelines he is in the vulnerable category.. Does the judge not view her sons life as important. This didnt need to be urgent as she offered the same solution nursing homes give by talking through the window….. Everyone who knows her and her son is extremely worried for gis saftey. What happens if she doesnt comply… She didnt even get a chance to plea her cause. Every professional amd article says this is extremely dangerous and could result in the worst outcome but they are ignoring what they state, and what the soul custody parent requested as long as the state of emergency is in effect.. Please help
Hello Gordon, I am so sorry to hear about your difficulties. We can not provide legal advice but we do have a few resources you can refer to. Have a look at our “Urgent” Court Cases and COVID-19 resource page https://representingyourselfcanada.com/urgent-court-cases-and-covid-19/ and webinars https://representingyourselfcanada.com/covid-19-related-information-for-srls-free-webinars/ and https://representingyourselfcanada.com/covid-19-related-webinar-your-legal-case-is-suspended-can-you-make-an-interim-agreement/. Thank you.
What happens if the non custodial parent is not complying with social distancing and the custodial parent offers to make up the dates instead of following the court order due to the pandemic but now the non custodial isn’t communicating back to arrange those dates?
Hi Katherine, please email us at representingyourself@gmail.com. Your question may fall under “legal advice” (which we can’t provide), but if not, our student research assistants may be able to find an informational answer to your question.
What is the recommendation for step sisters at the Father’s home, both of whom go to different schools. My two kids also go to two different schools, and are expected to reside with their father every other week. These girls also go to see their own father during the off weeks, when my children are with me.
Also, I’m a teacher (which means 5 different schools are involved here), and I’m so unsure what to do about our custody arrangement.
Hi Jen, please email us at representingyourself@gmail.com. Unfortunately we cannot provide specific legal advice, but our law student research assistants may be able to provide you with some informational and other resources.
According to family law, ‘custody’ refers to ‘decision-making.’ Having custody means the power of making a decision has been vested onto you. Suppose this custody is related to a child. In that case, the power to decide about the child’s education, health care, religious belief, involvement in extracurricular activities, immediate medical treatments, and other surrounding matters shall be decided by the parent in the custodial role. Custody can be sole or joint. In sole custody, one parent bears the entire responsibility of making significant decisions. Meanwhile, in joint custody, both the parents get to have equal time with their parents, know the rules about child custody after divorce. In this case, focusing on child support gets more privilege than the decision-making part. You can also check here for more detailed information about those in Shared Custody
My situation is that my spouse has a shared temporary custody order and we picked up his children and they were very sick. One with a fever of 40.7. The other parent did not alert us to this, instead she packed tylenol in their bag without regard to anyone’s health. She sent her boys to our home with fevers, compromising myself and my own children. I tested them for COVID and they were positive and they were exhibiting signs of sickness. I subsequently tested positive, likely because we see them twice a week and every other weekend. Our first thought was that the children should isolate here and we were advised by lawyers that we had to return them even after a legal letter was sent to their mother stating they were COVID positive, which she may have already known.
What a legal system, when she was blatantly allowed to send her kids to my home with acknowledged sickness and no communication. This resulted in a lawyers fee, and everyone in my home subject to COVID and the kids were allowed to return to her out of threats from a lawyer. The kicker, my son and myself are immune compromised and were blatantly put at risk.
How is that right?
It was great information thanks for sharing about the Custody agreement Alberta. It will help me to keep updated more Custody Agreement Alberta I hope you get more information.
I liked your webpage as it tells in detail about termination of parental rights form Ontario.